most are lame..1 is just..wrong..

1. What happened to the pea who tried to touch the corns cob? He got punched in the face, ran away and joined the Black Eyed Peas..

2. 7 Dwarves knock on a woman’s door
Woman: whose their?
Dwarves: Heigh Ho, Heigh ho..
Woman: *SLAP* who the FUCK you calling a ho you midgets!?!?

3. What do you call a cow that eats grass?
A lawn moooooooooooer

4. Two antennas met on a roof, fell in love and got married. The Ceremony wasn’t much, but the reception was excellent.

5. A jumper cable walks into a bar. The bartender says, “I’ll serve You, but don’t start anything.”

6. Two peanuts walk into a bar, and one was a salted….HA!

7. 2 potatoes were cooking in an oven.
One potato turns to the other and says “Geez, it’s hot in here!”
The other one says “WHOA!!! A talking potato!”

8.   What do you call 2 ethiopians in a gold sleeping bag?
Twix (oh dear….)

9. Two fish swim into a concrete wall. The one turns to the other
and says Dam!”

10. What caused the airline to go bankrupt? 
Runway inflation.

11. What did the rude prism say to the light beam that smacked into him? Get bent!

greatest headline: http://www.reuters.com/article/2010/07/03/us-athletics-diamond-idUSTRE6622I420100703

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